The Legend of Diddly Squat

did·dly·squat (dĭd'lē-skwŏt')
n. Slang
A small or worthless amount.

Read more: http://www.answers.com/topic/diddly-squat#ixzz2EUOvDOEG

Most families have a legend or great, amazing story to tell every Christmas to their loved ones...something grand enough to be told throughout the ages through generations. I thought I didn't have anything spectacular until I remembered THAT Christmas. THAT Christmas back in the mid-to early-eighties. Cop a squat and picture it...Pictou Co...snow falling in sparkly sheets, the usual plastic candles bedecking front doors shining with multi-colored strings of jewels (way before the days of mono-tone leds)

I was a precious, precocious, beautiful child....trust me. hehe j/k

I am a professional snooper. If there was a gift...I snooped. It is an obsession of sorts. I'd like to chalk it up to not liking being surprised and in case I didn't like the gift I would be prepared to have the proper expression of glee as to not hurt anyone's feelings. Between you and I though, I'm nosy.

Before I became professional and all ninja like so no one ever noticed I made a slit here in the paper...or pulled out a folded corner, peeked, and shoved it back in...I got caught. Christmas Eve.

My mother and father in a rage gathered up all of my sloppy snooped presents and piled them into the trunk of our car. With me pleading and sobbing, I was told that "People who snoop get diddly squat". I didn't know what that meant at the time but I knew it surely sucked worse then the coveted My Little Ponies and such that were destined to be mine.

My brand new Barbies...all gone. To be donated to another girl who would appreciate them more then me...a simple snooper.

I sobbed as I got ready for Midnight Mass, how could I be so stupid? What am I going to do with diddly squat? Can I find Santa in time to try to cut a deal it being Christmas Eve an all. At church, I sobbed when old ladies asked me what Santa was going to bring me "Diddly Squat". I became the perfect little Catholic on my knees praying to Baby Jesus to try to catch Santa in the air on the way by Heaven to let him know "THE SNOOPER REPENTS...THE SNOOPER REPENTS! Please no DIDDLY SQUAT!!"

I went to bed that night making deals with anyone who would listen...alive/dead/or otherwise.....

Have I mentioned I can be a little dramatic?

Anyhoooo

Santa and Baby Jesus must have taken pity on me or I did enough Hail Mary's...I dunno...but when I awoke on Christmas morning there sat all the gifts my parents took in the trunk of the car and donated to some other girl. Perfectly wrapped. My presents. No diddly squat. 

It was a wonderful materialistic Christmas Miracle.

The moral of the story kids? SLOPPY SNOOPERS GET DIDDLY SQUAT. Be like a ninja!!

Merry Christmas

Love

SHANTA! :)

School Registration- a step closer to having a life.

"You are going to cry so hard on the first day of school"................YAAA RIGHTTTTTTTTTTT!!!!


People are horrified that I say I wont cry when my kids go to big school in September. Why? Because most often mothers are weeping at the school bus stop, defeated their babies are growing up so fast...it must mean I don't love my kids as much as you all do... that's it!


Actually, it's quite opposite.


When you are the mother of more then one at a time, YES, you can't imagine having a little alone time...you bask in the thought of cleaning your house and it staying clean for over an hour..you can't imagine eating a plate of food without little bird mouths open waiting for you to share (no, not a'la Alicia Silverstone....blick!) etc etc


When you are the mother of premature children things go a step further. You have shed your tears beside an isolet, you DREAM this day might come...you cheer each milestone on and pray for the next because that means you survived and more importantly, THEY survived. 


There was days I walked into that NICU and had to come to terms that one, if not all three kids might not make it through the day. I've had to make life and death decisions for them, when I was barely mature enough to make them for myself. There was days (more so nights) I couldn't even picture them outside of the hospital let alone being old enough to go to grade primary!


Add on the fact that being so premature I had to accept the possibility they had a huge risk of having developmental delays, I think it is pretty exciting to know they are on par with their age group.


So excuse me if I don't understand why it is a time to grieve...I've done my grieving in 2007...I'm excited and so proud we all made it this far.......






well............ok.......I'm pumped for my freedom too...so sue me. :P